A stranger once called me and asked if my refrigerator were running. I said it was, and he said ‘Then you’d better catch it.’ I told him that I didn’t say it was running away from me, so for all he knew it was running towards me. He said that if it were running towards me then I’d still better catch it, lest it pass me, and then begin to run away from me, at which point I would need to catch it. I said, ‘What if I know for a fact that it’s running to the kitchen, where it lives?’ He said, if it had left the kitchen, then I should have caught it before it ran away in the first place. I said, ‘What if it’s running in a circle, or running in place?’ He said I would have to catch it anyway if I wanted to open it, hence, should go catch it now. I said, ‘What if I’ve trained it to stop running whenever I need to open it; or, am still able to open it while it’s running.’ He said that wouldn’t be a problem, but if it’s nature were to run, then it might eventually run away and need to be caught. I asked him what I should do once I caught it. He said: ‘Stop it from running.’
(via squawkback)

leftoverabby:

Look at this cute, fly, sexy mama of a woman!!

Oh look it’s me (;

leftoverabby:

Look at this cute, fly, sexy mama of a woman!!

Oh look it’s me (;


(via randomizzzed)


(via randomizzzed)


mydogsnokes:

There are some automatic toilets that need 2 chill the fuck out

(via parisizburning)